This is content from a newsletter I sent out that I decided to make available here on my website too. I hope you enjoy!
Hi there!
Readers of my website have been giving me feedback, and I’ve been discovering which of my writings seem to sing to people most. Lucky for me, those are my writings about connections. Attachment. The tangles that happen. The beautiful hopes and yearnings we have for connection, and how we can also feel so much conflict, ambivalence, even rage, in the middle of those yearnings.
Lately, I’ve been learning on two different framework on working with these tangles. One of them focuses on tracking second-by-second changes, to notice what helps each client to feel connected, seen, heard, safe. We actively make sure that we feel together in our work, that you feel connected and not alone. One of the premises of this work is that we can work through most any pain, except when we feel all alone with it. So we work to undo aloneness, second by second. We work to help the client to find the deepest yearnings, how to gently work around anxieties, holding the fear without letting the fear have the final word…..And this work helps you to find your deepest truths. About yourself, about connection. About who you truly are and what you truly want.
The other training is an extension of a training that those of you who’ve worked with me found SO helpful: A somatic approach. The last training I took was about how to recognize and work through trauma as it may show up in your body and your life today. It’s offered clients a profound understanding of how to embrace your body, how to regulate yourself — recognizing the signs of triggering, finding ways to resource yourself, finding ways to find your center and to find calm and safety when those storms from the past infringe on your present.
The extension on that I’m taking now goes SO much deeper, and offers profound ways to recognize and work with struggles around identity (Who am I?) and connection (Is it safe to connect? Is it okay to be vulnerable? Can I get my needs met? Are needs even okay?!).
This work also helps us to identify those kinds of hurts that can come before we have words. We find ways to compassionately find those hurting places that sometimes need something more than “talking about it”. We work with ways for your grown-up and me to together find those parts — and offer them a new experience. One of protection, perhaps, or connection, or resonance, or arms reaching out to welcome them.
Or one of having someone else big enough and strong enough to help, to take charge, to organize the work at hand. So that it’s finally safe to rest and stop feeling that ever-present need to be “all together” and “all grown up” (Which is exhausting for those of us who started to take that role on when we were little!)
That dang pattern of self-reliance can be a big deal. Lots of us who help others a lot and have learned to attune to others have learned this self-reliance — and many of us know how to practically run our own therapy (been there, done that!)! The lovely thing about this training is it’s teaching those of us in it to see right through that — and to recognize that the way to intervene kindly is also to be firm, focused. It’s new for me, and gives me scope beyond that “warm fuzzy helper” vibe. It’s been so fun! Transformative for me, transformative for clients.
I’m also returning to school this Fall, which makes for some schedule changes. But for now, I do have openings! You can schedule with me right on my page online – I’m here for you!
I’ve been enjoying discussing with some of you how my work differs from “Mental health treatment” – and it’s pretty simple. There’s a clear agreement I make with you that we’ll work with helping you to feel at home in your body and in your relationships – more connected, more authentic, more you. And that I’m happy to support you in finding different help if you want or need something more along the lines of “diagnosis and treatment”.
Thanks so much to all of you who have been supportive, loudly (with your impassioned emails!) or quietly. I so appreciate you, and would love to hear from you about what you might like to see more content about.
I’ll be in touch!
Warmth and Excitement,
Michaela